Love Song for Nancy Drew

This week’s Fashion & Style section of the New York Times included a well-titled tribute to the Nancy Drew mystery book series, “Nancy Drew’s Granddaughters,” and included several choice quotes from many famous and ambitious female political and social figures who read the series as a child. Unfortunately, as sometimes happens with the Times, the short article had the feel of an overedited, in-just-before-the-deadline one-off, and not of the quality tribute that the indomitable Carolyn Keene deserves.

Before I continue, I do want to mention that in the second grade I was heartbroken to find out from our elementary school librarian, Mrs. Lawless, that my heroine Ms. Keene did not, in fact, exist. The Nancy Drew mystery series, which according to the Times piece debuted in the 1930s, was written not by one single author, but by a long series of authors and editors who wrote under the name of Carolyn Keene, a pseudonym. I had inquired with Mrs. Lawless after heading determinedly into the library with pencil and paper in hand, intent on telling the authoress how much I liked her books and how much they meant to me, and that I was waiting for her to publish the next one.

I was young enough at the time that copyright and publication dates meant less than nothing to me, and that pencil and paper would be the instruments assisting in the writing of my communique. Suffice it to say, I was more than a little bit devastated that there in fact was no Carolyn Keene to read and receive my letter. For if Carolyn Keene didn’t exist (and surely, she must!) then to whom could I write?

I was a very, very nerdy child, and I most definitely looked the part. I actually remember the feeling I got while learning to read in Kindergarten, struggling through the “Sam I Am” book series even as I considered them to be more than a little bit unenlightening, although I reluctantly admitted to myself that I was perpetually curious to find out what exactly would happen to Sam on the next page. I remember the daffodil yellow cover of the books, which were really merely pamphlets, and how the little photocopied pages felt in my hands as I triumphed over first one then another page, working my way through the books until I successfully met the release that was the back cover.

In first grade I have a clear memory of sitting in the corner at one of the child-sized low, round tables in Mrs. Whitlock’s classroom, and being embarrassed and annoyed by the lunch-lady (who I ran into at the airport just a few years back, and who still remembered me as the prolific reader in the corner) coming over to praise me for always reading, something I hadn’t necessarily realized I was doing until she pointed it out. The other kids from my class and their day-to-day activities didn’t hold my interest the way the books did, however, a phenomenon that would prove true through at least the first half of high school. I was much more interested in what I was discovering about the world through reading, and in all the great stories that existed to be discovered.

As I grew older I read more and more aggressively, learning to read through the roar of our television, on long car rides, and in class. In particular I read in math class, which I found horribly and unutterably boring, and would hold the book open in my lap behind the little curved plastic desks, pushing it forward almost onto my knees and pressing them up against the desk to pin it there whenever an alert teacher deigned to meander my way during lessons. I was rarely caught or chastised probably, in hindsight, not because I was so crafty with hiding my books (somehow I doubt I got around Mr. Blanchard, my fourth grade teacher, of all people), but because it was so infrequent and likely very amusing to come across a kid who so loved to read that she snuck books between the pages of her math text and sought to craftily hide her reading during other lessons. I attribute both my exceptionally high verbal scores and my exceptionally low math scores to this years-long behavior, and smile now to think of what my teachers must have thought about the little nerd child.

At home I read in the shower,  soaking many a library loaner by pressing the book up against the shower wall with one elbow and quasi-shampooing my hair with my other hand, or by leaving the book on the old radiator with white-chipped-paint just outside the shower doors, anchoring the pages down with the shampoo bottle, and leaving the shower door open.  When I couldn’t find books to read that were yet to be digested, I read shampoo bottles, ingredient lists, classified ads, music lyrics, and (perhaps best of all) my dad’s copies of the ‘Reader’s Digest.” In later years I read books far beyond my years, age, and knowledge of the world, and as a child I read through lunches and classes right up through Middle School, when someone picked up on how bored I was in school and skipped me a year in English and Social Studies, and when the social scene first began to develop and I realized to my surprise that I was intrigued by the possibility of playing a part.

There are several good stories to be told about the nerd child and her great books, and were I to paint you a picture of me during my childhood, you’d find a slender but tall little girl with long, thick brown hair pulled back into a hairband from a great big forehead, wearing some awful printed mock turtle-neck top from Land’s End with teddy bears or images of presents patterned across the material, and  thick aqua-blue plastic glasses two sizes too large for her face. She would be huddled off to the side of a large group of students, the latter of whom were flush in the moment of coming of age, while she herself was engrossed in her canary yellow covered hardcopy book, chin in hand, deep in thought. And between the canary yellow covers in the midst of a great adventure and perhaps more importantly terrific feat of mental reckoning you would find nerdy little me, a plump young girl named Bess, a tomboy named George, and our good friend, Nancy Drew.

Nancy Drew was for me both hero and heroine – she was effeminate (she wore pearls) and also tough, full of sass and not about to take ‘no’ for an answer. She snuck out of the house without fear of the dark or the scary things it could contain, and her friendships were not merely those of young girls learning about the world and themselves, but of alliances, from which she acquired the strengths and abilities she could not find in herself. She was a superhero in a skirt, and even though I occasionally found her perfection and Home Ec-yness (which I might even then have referred to as Home Ickyness) a little too saccharine sweet for my taste, I was always along for the ride, usually tagging along on George’s coattails, as her toughness and resilience were a bit more closely aligned with where I sought to locate myself in the world.  The girls of the Nancy Drew series made me feel strong, and capable, and safe, and the works of Carolyn Keene made me feel normal, and smart, and powerful within my own tiny corner of the world at a time when my growing understanding of myself and how big the world can be most needed that reassurance.

The Times article asked many famous women “who their Nancy Drew was,” and I would say that mine was daring and brave, and took risks with her physical well-being only when she knew that her intellectual abilities and powers of reasoning could get her out of any sticky situation she might find herself in. Indeed, the latter helped her wriggle free from many a prickly situation, and I in my real life (when I actually put down the book long enough to observe it in progress) began to similarly use my own creativity and resourcefulness to get myself out of the sticky situations of the day-to-day life of a grade schooler (of which I don’ t really think there were all that many). From the Drew books I developed the ability to see the world more clearly, when I was attentive enough to it to discern the patterns and causality in grown-up life, and would even today attribute much of my observational aptitude to the good role models that Nancy Drew and her sidekicks provided.

I remember too how exhilarating it was to go to the local library and run my fingers cross-wise along the spines of the 40+ Nancy Drew books that they held from the series, overjoyed with the secret coup-de-grace of a whole bookshelf’s worth of material that, it appeared, only I was clever enough to check out and read. And I remember as well how it felt the day I returned the last books to the library (for I used to check out dozens at a time, taking them home in a large plastic shopping bag imprinted with the acronym of the local librarians’ union), and realized that I had out-read the series – I had finished off Nancy Drew, and in fact had read so many of the works multiple times that there was no longer any more previously overlooked nuances to detect.

It was with a heavy heart then that I moved down a shelf, to the aquamarine blue bindings of the Hardy boys series, which I devoured just as quickly, although with a little less exhilaration than that of Nancy Drew (because ugh! They were boys!), and an even heavier heart that shortly thereafter I returned the last of that series as well. I even now recall the awe and pride of standing in front of the entire mystery section of the children’s room of the library, and seeing that I had read every title across a half dozen floor-to-ceiling shelves, and the sadness that accompanied the understanding that I had moved beyond my old friends, and would have to let them go if I wanted to keep reading.

Nancy Drew was my co-conspirator, my inspiration, someone who challenged and befriended me during the angst of the first  decade of my life, in a time before laptops and iPhones and constant internet connectivity and the endless barrage of the television. She met me in the quiet places in my house, held my attention, and pushed me to try harder, go farther, and think more creatively at a very formative and vulnerable age. And when I finally left that children’s room book section for the ‘Young Adult’ shelves (whose location was trepidatiously close to the Adult books consumed by my mother, a voracious reader herself), I remember the chagrin and nostalgia of leaving a roomful of well-known and closely loved friends behind, and the indebtedness I felt to Nancy Drew, who I knew would protect all the other books and characters in my absence. Losing the Drew series was a lot like losing an old friend at that relatively tender young age, but she and her co-conspirators opened the door for me to a whole host of other works, and life experiences lived between the pages of great and sometimes not so great works of literature, and for that I will always be tremendously grateful.

-M-

Out of the Woods (for now)

Whew. Where to start? It has been one hell of a week, to be sure. The last 9 days have been almost completely filled by all-day stretches of forest sampling, bookended  by rushed laundering of my field clothes (which right this moment are soaking away some of the grime in a bucket in my bathroom), charging of batteries, a lengthy shower, and at least 8 hours per night of sleep. Add to that the 19 leeches, two troops of monkeys, one give-or-take six-foot-long snake, approximately six vertical falls down hillsides (or off of slick, well-traveled pathways), and 5,200 square meters of government-protected forest sampled and yeah…you could say it has been a busy week.

First, the gist. This week we planned on hammering out six of the twelve forests I sought to sample, as all six are ten hectares or less in size, and therefore considered “very small,” even for a community-managed forest. A hectare is 10,000 square meters, which sounds like a very odd amount of land for any society to delineate, until you realize it is 100 meters on a side. So when I say I sampled ‘x’ number of hectares, what I really mean is I sampled a 100 by 100 meter square, that many times over.

At the beginning of the week, however, a series of small things went wrong which maligned all my carefully made plans, and sent us to Rani Ban instead. Ran Ban is the largest forest I planned to sample, a government-managed chunk of forest near several key pieces of Nepali infrastructure (the massive dam that Pokhara depends on for electricity, in part, and the former king’s holiday retreat, just to name two), and has been “protected” by the government for quite some time. I say “protected” not to belittle the efforts of the Nepali government, but to emphasize for you the size of this forest, and the sheer scale of the operation that would be required to truly protect such a gigantic piece of forested land in a country where so many people desperately need the resources forests provide. Rani Ban (Ban means ‘forest’ in Nepali) is a 210 hectare forest, which means 2,100,000 square meters. It covers most of a medium-sized “hill,” this being the Middle Hills region, but keep in mind that I’m climbing around in the trees at somewhere between 800-1,000 meters of elevation – not quite a hill for the average east coaster of an American…

To put it in perspective, when I hit 1,000 meters of elevation on my GPS earlier this afternoon, I was only a couple hundred feet shy of the elevation of the biggest mountains in the Catskill mountains of New York, the thirty-five 35ers (or 3,500 footers), where I somewhat regularly hike. So I effectively spent the last five days in particular climbing up, over, and down the flanks of a mountain the size that you’d find in the Catskills – and then repeating the process over and over again 400 meters along the way as I began each transect, which start at the base of the hillside. It was hard, hard work.

Although we had decided to save the biggest forests for last, we shifted our focus to Rani Ban this week when a series of glitches involving weather and staffing (of my field crew) prevented us from working in first one, then another of the community forests we had already visited, and I fell back on Rani Ban (which is extremely accessible from Ban Campus, although only relative to the accessibility of the other forests) by default.

It turned out to be a blessing in disguise. To take an adequate sample from Rani Ban we had to do a tremendous amount of sampling (we have at least 52 10 x 10 meter plots sampled, with 4 1×1 subplots, and 1 5×5 subplot per each overall plot), which gave us the opportunity to hone our technique and approach, while taking statistical refuge in the safety of numbers. What I mean by this is that by letting our roughest plots (our first few) happen in a big forest, we probably hedge our bets that any errors in sampling would come out in the wash (the wash being basic statistical analysis of so many data points). Although we tried very hard not to make any errors from the time we began work in Rani Ban, they are almost inevitable at the beginning of any field sampling, and could include reading a diameter tape at the wrong place, creating a plot not quite 10 x 10 meters, incorrectly or inconsistently identifying plants, or estimating tree height. We carry a myriad of tools with us to avoid these kinds of errors, but – mistakes happen – all you can do is do your best, put forth a good faith effort, and in the words of a wise field ecologist “sample till your feet hurt.”

Which, in fact, is exactly what we did.

I’ll get more into the sampling process, and some of the nuance and questions I’m seeking to evaluate (as well as newly developed obstacles to some of the answers) in a blog post tomorrow, when I’ve gotten some decent sleep, but here are the lows, the highs, and the “meh: I can do betters” of this last week of fieldwork.

Lows:
1. Being stymied by logistics. I was stunned by the amount of entreating, cajoling, organizing, and arranging it took to get to my field sites, and to get the requisite field crew there with me at an early enough time in the morning to make a serious dent in the plotwork. Between spotty buses, a field assistant oversleeping, me forgetting to photocopy the datasheets one morning (::cough:: this morning ::cough::), taking the bus in the wrong direction, the Range Post Office’s Forest Guard “volunteer” changing every.single.day, and the timing of the Nepali meal schedule (10am? WTF?), it was damn hard to get two solid chunks of time per day to hammer out some fieldwork. And oh did I learn a whole helluva lot about entreating, cajoling, and double-checking bus destinations in the progress….

2. The first two days. We started in the field a week ago this past Thursday, and the first two days I was miserable. Miserable for a couple of reasons, all of which I very intimately understand, but they were bad enough that I pulled the plug for a day last weekend, to mull things over and make changes in my process. I even wrote a blogpost after my pull the plug day, in which I talked a lot about how maybe this wasn’t the field for me after all, and how perhaps I had outgrown my desire to do fieldwork, or to sample anything. That has since changed, but I was coming down really hard on my abilities as a manager/employer, as my sampling protocols felt really out of control in the hands of my first two field assistants, and I felt extremely isolated being the only one of three people spending the whole day together in the forest but not speaking Nepali fluently.

3. Cultural differences in understandings of the following: “work,” “workday,” “hard work,” “good data,” and “work late.” This is not a knock against Nepalis – there are legitimate, important differences between the conceptualization of these terms between our two countries, and in short order I realized all the good reasons why I couldn’t just steamroll through and organize my dad as if I were working in American. I don’t have a great resolution at hand, at the moment, but I’m working on it.

Highs:

1. I feel sheepish saying this, but let’s be honest – it was the monkeys. Yesterday at around 1,000 meters of elevation I was leading the group up a sheer hillside in order to set the next plot up before they got there, and as I bushwacked upslope through the underbrush, following a bearing on my compass, I realized a troop of Rhesus monkeys was passing overhead. As I watched they actually descended from the treetops quite a bit to scope me out, and then to my utter amazement actually descended all the way to the forest floor(!), where they proceeded to walk the trails about 20 meters ahead of me for a short while. Only a few did this that I could see, but when they did it absolutely took the forward motion right out of me.

I have seen monkeys and baboons in several countries, but there was something truly tremendous about seeing them descend down to the forest floor, and my own plane of existence. It spooked me a little bit, to tell the truth, and it was breath-taking to see them walking along the path on all fours. It was reminiscent of the large, tawny-haired cat I saw around this time last year, in Costa Rica, if only for the way the muscle rippled below the fur, as it prowled along through this particular stretch of protected forest. Other troop members descended to low branches and simply hung out there for awhile, mouths agape, trying to discern exactly what it was we were up to in their forest. And I myself returned their gaze in full – eyes wide, mouth agape. Monkeys!

2. Finishing a forest! It felt so good to know we were done today, and to think of the (piles of) data I now have at my fingertips, both to enter into my laptop and to sort through (ahem: plants in bags). Halfway through the week I found out that Rani Ban has never before been inventoried, so this is the first ever description of the forest resources available to be harvest, managed, preserved or protected. I thought that was pretty cool, and am glad that the data I gathered will provide a baseline for reference by the Nepali people who manage it in the years to come. A few of the forest guards were equally jazzed to see the outcome of my data, and to read the report I draft up. My research is on forest management instead of forest ecology (although to be truthful, I’m measuring forest ecology as an indicator of the effect of different types of forest management) because I wanted to do something applied for my project, and create information and knowledge that would benefit people in the country in which I work, beyond myself. So check that one off the list!

3. Seeing the forest users in action. A few days ago we saw an old woman, bent low with the weight of the huge basket of freshly cut “dead” branches hung off her forehead and lengthwise down her back, and with her permission, I took her picture. These are not “bad people” who are using this protected forest illicitly – rather, they are members of adjacent communities whose survival is inextricably linked to the products they can pull out of the local forest system, but who in some cases they are using the forest unsustainably, taking out more than the forest can replace or give back. Helping women like the one we saw continue to rely on the forest while not irreparably damaging it is one of the central tenets of community forest management, and is also the motivation for my field project.

Yesterday in the forest we saw two different old women illegally harvesting timber and non-timber forest products (an example of the latter would be firewood, lokta, a plant used for paper, or mushrooms), and although we were in the company of the forest guard, he did not arrest them. He called out to them in an emphatic manner, told them to stop removing material from the forest, and be on their way, but he did not intervene, or even look closely to see what they’d taken. As it turns out, I learned later, he does not have the authority to arrest the women, or to fine them. The only authority vested in him, as one of the main patrolers in the forest, is that of bringing the women in to the Range Post (sort of the equivalent of a remote field office for the Forest Service), where the Range Post Officer could fine them, should he so desire.

But put yourself in his shoes for a second here – you are approximately 2,000 meters (2K!) away from your range post office, and it’s a sweltering hot, buggy day, with leeches, biting ants, and mosquitoes rampant. Your options are traveling back to the range post, dragging along an unwilling, loudly complaining and potentially physically aggressive little old lady just trying to get some firewood to cook dhal bhaat for her family, along several hundred meters of elevation, through dense forest, or else simply calling her out through the trees, but leaving her be to decide what she’ll do next. Do you haul her in?

Yeah, me neither. So is there protection to be had in this protected forest? Only the data will tell. But it’s some crazy tasty food for thought, we’ve just stumbled across here…

4. Looking at the map on my GPS unit tonight, and seeing four mostly straight little flag-riddled transects crisscrossing their way across my Nepal map. We did that!

5. Hitting my stride. After those first two shitty days and my personal day of reckoning, I kicked ass. Okay maybe not quite, but I worked hard, I moved fast(ish), I climbed high and I took the goddamned data until it was done. Day Three I woke up ready, and remembered how this works: you put your life, and everything in it, on autopilot (or perhaps I should say “an out of office reminder”) and hone in on what matters. Data.

“Mehs”

1. My field crew. It’s constantly evolving. I’ve been told that I work like “a soldier,” “a man,” and “too hard.” I can’t keep the same ‘Dai’ (older brother) from the Range Post office, from one day to the next. These are the folks who should be most familiar with the forest, its terrain, and the leg muscles it takes to get them into and across them. Instead, I am roaring through forest watchers and lower forest office staff. When I was finally given a former army officer the other day, I thought, “at last!” Someone who really knows how to work. And although the dai worked easily throughout the day, and was the first here to scale a hill slope faster than my own legs could accommodate, the next day a different ‘dai’ appeared at the agreed upon meeting place, and shared that the previous day’s dai had twisted an ankle. “When?” I wanted to know. “When he was working with me?” Although answers were not forthcoming, I later ascertained that by “twisted an ankle,” what was really meant was “his legs hurt.” “And he was very tired afterwards!” the new dai added on, as if in his friend’s defense. To my mind, he might not have been so tired if he didn’t pause hourly to light a joint. Yes, a marijuana joint. But, hey, that’s just me…

2. Being in charge of the field crew. Now that’s different. Let me just say here – to my memory, I was an exceptional, motivated, hard-working, precise and accurate fieldworker. This probably isn’t possible or even totally true, but damn if I didn’t work my butt off in those jobs. I look back to my former boss Donie’s interview process (an hour long! It was epic) for a simple field assistantship, and appreciate her thinking much more deeply now. Man, that woman is smart. It is one thing to be a field crew member, and another thing altogether to be boss, friend, guide, field crew member, and project director. Every inattentive measurement taken is a personal, deeply felt slight, every whining complaint (too tired, to hot, too hard, too hungry) injurious to my heart and my ego. Worst of all are the quiet comments in Nepali, not so insidious as they sound, but worst because I can’t understand them and all parties involved know this. And worst because you don’t need to speak Nepali to understand tone.

3. Struggling with scheduling. Getting up at 5 or 6 am (as I did several time this week) is understandable if you’ll be at work at 6 or 7, but to wake that early and not get into the forest until 10 or 11 seems unthinkable. Trying to mitigate the meal schedule by feeding my field crew myself in the morning has been a black hole for our time and energy, although perhaps contributed to some amount of crew bonding (for the crew that returns, anyway). Lunch is incredibly inconvenient, but packed, non-warm/wet lunches are almost an insult in Nepal. Were I to be working alone I would take a snack-style lunch and work straight through the day, but instead we descended several hundred meters several days this week to eat a huge daal bhaat meal, which my field assistants consumed all the more zealously because the work made them hungry. But the food makes them exceptionally sluggish, and I’ve come to hate the first daal bhaat meal of the day. It interrupts our process, puts us back at the bottom of the hill (the worst!), and totally interferes with my own personal motivation. Everyone is grumpy about starting again, having cooled off long enough to no longer be literally dripping sweat, and perhaps a little unpleasantly full.

4. Unteachable moments. For the life of me, I cannot make my field crew love (or plain old appreciate) why we are doing what we are doing. I tried all week long, and have now come to an understanding with the futility of it all. When my field crew complains or drags their feet (the latter of which burns fantastic amounts of time – just stupendous amounts of time), I try to help them “see” the forest better, or explain the data analysis process more clearly, but so far I have had middling success. I point out the old bari (cultivated fields – what the Westerner envisions as a rice paddy complete with terracing) underneath the foliage, or how the vines are in fact crawling up intact woody stems which have sprouted new young leaves after being lopped by some errant harvester. I emphasize the differences in foliage on slopes with different aspects (the compass direction the plots face), dwell on riparian buffer zones (a fancy way of saying the land around streams and water bodies), and ask open-ended questions about tree form and quality, size, shape, and possible sources of disfiguration, galls, and multiple trunks in a given tree. I think I’m doing a good job, but for the life of me, I cannot get them jazzed the way I felt jazzed as a bushey-eyed young student, eager to learn and retain as much as I could. I don’t really ask that they love it (truth be told, even I do not love inventory) but I do ask that they understand and appreciate it, and that they prioritize the collection of good data. In fact, I might even be about to demand that last bit.

-M-

Michael Jackson Tribute from my Alaskan Spiritual Home

Toolik Field Station in Alaska is like none other, and this proves it:

Although I do want to add that, contrary to what the good folks at the Nature blog said, as a founding member of the first EVER Toolik Dance Team (to our knowledge), Arctic Researchers are, in fact, known for our rhythm. As well as general, all-around bad-assedness.

Four years ago this summer a five woman international (thanks Kanchan) dance troupe wore lab coats dyed with permanent marker soaked in buckets of water, with Nepali written along the bottom, and black long underwear shirts on top to  perform a Bollywood dance in the Presentation Tent, with a whole lot of famous and fabulous scientists and field crew members watching. And we rocked it.

How’s THAT for rhythm, Nature?